he said yes!

I recently finished a Bible study on Ruth by Kelly Minter.  Oh how I have clung to Ruth’s story through these past few months.  As I read the unornamented words that explained her story, I felt her pain and sorrow. But I also saw her strength, obedience, faithfulness, trust, and loyalty and I could not help but long to have these traits grown in me as well.

But why does it have to be at such a high cost?  I wrestled with the Lord, wondering what kind of God takes so much from someone and calls that a “good” plan.  What kind of God can look down on our misery and continue allowing us to tread water so that He can be glorified?

He answered me ever so sweetly and in the most calming, gentle voice… “the kind of God that longs to grow character in His children, the kind of God that wants to bless us far beyond what our wildest dreams can fathom.”  I imagined Him lifting my chin and cupping His hands around my jaws as He continued, “and beloved, I AM that God.”

And that was that.

So where do I start?   I knew it wasn’t by pouting, stomping my feet, and throwing tantrums because I’m not getting what I want out of my life.  I found that as I surrendered my life to God, and repeatedly told Him how much I want to be where He wants me to be, the more He revealed His plan.

The first week school was back in session, I heard three different times that I could go no further in my language therapy training if I didn’t have my Master’s degree.  I also heard that Shelton is part of a cohort program with Dallas Baptist University, which would allow me to complete my degree online.  A week later, I found out a lacked two classes to graduate! 

Rewind with me for a moment. Three years ago I was working at Shelton and wanted to get my Master’s degree.  I talked it over with Husband and we decided it would be pointless because once I got pregnant, I’d want to drop out of school, quit work and stay home.  If I had said yes, I’d have my degree by now and could be working on becoming a Certified Academic Language Therapist, which is my goal!

I realized I could waste a lot of life hoping to be pregnant and wishing to be in another season of life.  But God has me in this season, at this time, for a very specific purpose. He has given me a passion to teach children with learning differences, an amazing school to teach at, and basically dropped the opportunity for grad school in my lap.

I want to be a vessel fit for His use both now and later. I don’t know what the next three weeks, three months, or three years of my life will look like. But I’m learning to cling to what I have now and to live in the moment, full of joy and contentment.

So I presented the grad school opportunity to Husband one more time. And he said yes!

humbled by His faithfulness and love,

sarah jane